Im Sorry
by JJBrowneyes
Summary: I dont own Life With Derek.Derek see's a different side of Casey when running into old acquaintances. If you dont like it, dont read it. No flames.
1. Chapter 1

" Class, on your desk you will find a slip of paper. On the slip of paper is a name. You are not allowed to tell anyone what name is written on your sheet of paper. On that sheet of paper, I want you to write one word that you think describes that person. Each day, you will have a different person on your sheet of paper, and at the end of the week you will hand at in to me. At the end of the month, I will tally up what word describes you most as said by the class. That word will be given to you and you will write an essay on what you think that word means. " Said Mrs. O'Brien, Casey and Derek's English teacher.

"Yes Casey?" sighed the teacher as she saw Casey Mcdonalds hand shoot up.

"Whats the point of this assignment? What is it supposed to teach us?"

_Riiiiiiiiing._

Casey looked disappointed as the bell rang. Mrs. Obrian on the other hand, couldn't be more overjoyed. Seriously? Who cares what the point is? What kind of teenager is she?!

……………………………………..

"Derek! I told you about this weeks ago!" said a frustrated Casey. Her eyes shined with determination as she tried to wrestle the keys out of Derek's hand.

"And you thought I would remember? Do you know me at all Space case?" Derek looked genuenly confused. When have I ever remembered anything said in advance?

"I don't care! Just give me the car keys! I couldn't go yesterday because of your stupid date with Sarah. Or the day before that because of Meagan. You don't always have to take the car you know! You can use your legs and walk!"

Casey almost giggled at the horrified look on Derek's face. Almost.

"You gotta be kidding me! Walk? Why would I do that when I have a car? Besides, I have a date with Kendra tonight. A fine lady like that cant walk anywhere, she needs to be driven in style."

"Look _Dare-bear, _its not your car, its ours! And if you don't give me those keys, I'll make sure George knows exactly where you go on Tuesday nights!" Casey's threatening gaze made Derek swallow. How could she know?

"He knows where I go, spacecase. On a date? Just like every other day?"

"I knew it!" Mocked a triumphant Casey.

Derek raised his eyebrow. "Know what?" he said confused as Sam came up behind him.

"Well I always knew you would date anything with legs, and up until sometime ago I figured you would draw the line at your best friend. I've been suspecting for some time now that you and Sam have a thang thang going on." Winked Casey, raising her eyebrows up and down suggestively.

Sam sputtered his drink causing a few odd glances to come there way.

"What are you guys _talking_ about?!"

Realizing Sam had spoken, Derek came out of his stupor and smirked.

"Oh sweetheart! Casey has found out our secret! We no longer have to hide our love for another from her!" Cried Derek throwing his arms in the air. Sam, catching on, grinned.

"Oh my darling! I'm so happy!" he said dramatically making a show of throwing he's arms around Derek.

"Ok, ok! I draw the line at hugging!" Yelled Derek as he removed Sam's arms from his neck, earning a few more odd glances.

"so what's really going on here?" asked Sam.

"I told Derek a few weeks ago that I would need the car tonight, and now he wont give me the keys!" said Casey, desperately trying to keep the amused grin from their little 'act' off her face.

"And I told Casey that she should know me by now, I don't remember anything. I have a date tonight with Kendra anyway, so I need the car."

Sam was looking between the two when his gaze rested upon Casey. Her eyes were sparkling, her cheeks were flushed and-wait a minute, was she _smilin_g?!

When he looked at Derek, he was shocked to see the same thing.

'_They actually enjoy this!'_

"And I said, if you don't give me the car keys I'll tell George exactly where you go on Tuesdays." Retorted Casey.

Derek smirked. "As I said before spacecase, he knows I'm on a date. I don't see why it's a big deal."

"Yes because you take all your dates to hang out at a strip club with Sam."

_Check mate. _

"What? I don't know what your talking about."

How does she know? 

"I'm not giving you these car keys!"

………………………………………………………

"Explain to me again how you managed to get me to give you the car keys?" complained Derek.

"Let it go Derek. We're almost there." Said Casey as she turned into the exit on the highway.

"So who did you get for the assignment in class?" asked Casey curiously.

"I'm not allowed to tell you, remember?" said a cranky Derek.

"Since when do you ever follow the rules?"

"Since you somehow managed to get me to give you the car keys."

"LET IT GO DEREK! Never mind. We're here anyway." Said Casey as she pulled into the parking lot.

Distillers tickets on sale now! 

Derek looked at Casey disbelievingly. "You listen to the Distillers?!"

"Yeah. So?" She said carelessly.

"_You _listen to the Distillers." He said again only slower this time, as if trying to process the information.

Casey looked at Derek strangely. "Yes Derek. I listen to the Distillers." Speaking as though she would to a three year old. "Now hurry up. I don't want to get stuck in a line."

"Spacecase. There are like three people there. Actually. That girl is kinda hot." Said Derek. The girl, had long wavy blond hair, that had light red streaks in it. She was wearing jeans with boots that ended under her knee. Her black top had writing on it, but he wasn't close enough to see.

"_That_ girl is taken. So hands off." Said Casey rolling her eyes.

"And you would know this how?"

"Because idiot, people tend to kiss their boyfriends." Said Casey pointing at the girl who was putting her arms around her assumed boyfriend. _She looks kind of familiar. _"Doyou know her Derek?"

Derek snorted. "As soon as pretty boy leaves, I will."

The girl turned her head towards them as they came closer. Her boyfriend whispered something in her ear but her eyes were dead set on Casey. Casey was laughing with Derek as the girls face lit up in recognition.

"Cas? Is that you?"

Casey looked around. Nobody had called her Cas in a long time.

Derek started to explain to the girl that she must be confused when he felt Casey stiffen.

When he turned to look at her, he saw that her eyes were cold and condemning. _What the hell? _

"What can I do for you Merlin?" said Casey with an icy tone.

"Names Marie now. Nobody calls me Merlin, you know that." Said Marie accusingly.

"And no one calls me Cas anymore. In fact, people stopped calling me Cas a long time ago, isn't that right Ace?" said Casey addressing Marie's boyfriend.

Ace looked shocked. "Its good to see you Cassidy."

Derek looked around confused. How the hell would Casey know these people?

Just as he was about to say something he heard Casey speak.

"Don't you dare talk to me as if you have a right to." If anyone had thought that Casey's tone was cold before, the north poll seemed like Hawaii now.

Marie stood up. "Don't talk to my boyfriend like that!" she said threateningly.

Casey chuckled a laugh that had no warmth. "I wont talk to your boyfriend at all. Now get out of my face."

"Or what?"

"Or I'll make you remember what its like to fuck with me." Said a calm Casey.

Derek looked betweeb the two. What the hell is she doing? This girl could take her anyday! Again as he was about to step in he saw the look Casey gave him.

As Marie started to laugh and stand up closer to her, Casey grabbed her hand and started twisting both middle and index fingers. When she heard a crack she let go.

Derek looked at Casey shocked. Why would she do something like that?

Marie stared wide-eyed at her hand. It wasn't broken. Just in a hell of a lot of pain.

"I told you not to fuck with me." Said Casey softly.

"C'mon Derek. Forget the tickets. Maybe another time."

"Uh, yeah, another time." Stuttered Derek.

As they walked away Derek could feel Marie's eyes boring on his back.

When he looked back she winked at him and licked her lips.

_Okay she's hot. But not that hot._

When he looked at Casey he realized that she was almost at the car.

"Case! Wait up!"

Casey was quite as they drove home, and when Derek had tried to ask her what that was about she just replied with a "Not now Derek. Just please. Not now." Her voice was so hoarse and broken that he didn't have the heart to push her. But still. He couldn't help but wonder what the hell was going on with Casey.


	2. Chapter 2

_Only A Dream._

Once they got home, Casey told Derek to take the car. He seemed confused until she reminded him that he had a date with Kendra.

"Look Case. I understand if you don't want to talk about it, but I'm here if you need me. He shifted a bit and looked slightly uncomfortable. Casey looked up in surprise.

"Thanks Derek. But it's not a big deal. Go have fun on your date." She smiled softly at him.

"How about we just hang out or something?" he still looked uncomfortable.

"I still have a few assignments to do. Maybe tomorrow ok?" she replied.

Derek rolled his eyes. She was back to normal. "Casey, its Friday. Nobody does their homework on a Friday."

"Which is exactly why the drop out rates are so high!"

As he listened to her go on about the statistics of dropouts he couldn't help but wonder if she was really okay. When they were in the car, she was so out of it. _Not now Derek. Just please, not now. _She sounded so sad. How was it that she could go from almost breaking a girls finger, to ranting about how everyone should do their homework as soon as they get it?

"Yeah, whatever, I'm leaving now!" he yelled as he grabbed his leather jacket and walked out the door.

Casey sighed and went to get out her homework.

………………………………………………………………………….

"Honey, I have another date tonight and Lizzy's gone to hang out with a Kayla. Do you mind picking her up at 7?" asked Nora as she put on an earring.

"_Yeah sure mom, no problem." Replied Casey. She didn't have anything to do anyway._

"_alright, well you have my cell phone number, and Kayla's number is on the fridge. Call if you need anything."_

"_Yeah sure mom. Have a good time tonight."_

"_Thanks case. I love you." Said Nora as she grabbed her car keys._

"_Love you too." Replied Casey as Nora kissed her on the head before rushing out._

_Not five minutes had passed since she left when the doorbell rang._

"_sorry Ace, Merlin's not here." Said Casey once she had opened the door to see Ace standing there with his hands in his pockets._

"_Um yeah. I know. I just wondered if we could talk."_

_Casey looked confused. Sure Ace was a nice guy, but the only time they ever spoke was with Merlin. _

"_Uh okay.. Come on in." she said opening the door wider._

_Once they sat on the couch Ace started to talk._

" _Marie and I broke up."_

_Merlin's real name was Marie, but when she was little, Casey became enchanted with the nights of the round table and the Lancelot stories. She had decided that Marie would be Merlin the warlock in the games they played, and the name just kind of stuck. People had started calling her merlin along with Casey, but soon became frightened of Marie's reaction._

"_What? Why?" Why is he telling me this?_

"_She thought I was cheating. Looking at other girls and stuff in front of her." He said rolling his eyes._

"_Oh. Well why don't you go talk to her about it? Maybe you can work it out." She said, emphasizing on __her._

"_The thing is, that although I wasn't cheating on her, there's someone else." He said confusing Casey even more. Why is he telling ME this?!_

"_I've had my eye on her for a while now. And I think that she's had her eye on me but hasn't really done anything about it because of Marie." He continued._

_Finally Casey decided it was time for him to leave._

"_Look, im not sure why your telling me this, but Merlin's a really good friend of mine, and I don't think she'd appreciate you talking to me about you love life. I think its time for you to go." She said as she stood up._

_As he stood up, Casey suddenly became uncomfortable. He looked bigger somehow._

"_I don't think you quite understand Cas. How about you show me your room?"_

"_Look I really think you should go. My moms going to come home soon." She said. Now she was scared. _

"_The more the merrier right?" he said as he roughly grabbed her arm and started up the stairs._

"_Let go of me!" she yelled. When he continued to pull her, she bit down with all her might._

_She felt a flicker of hope as he yelped in pain but it quickly died when she saw him smile. A sickening smile that she'd never forget for as long as she lived._

"Oh baby, I'm so glad you like it rough." He said as he pressed his body against hers and continued to drag her up the stairs.

……………………………………………………..

"Casey wake up!" Yelled Lizzy. Casey was shaking violently in her sleep letting out loud whimpers.

As Casey looked around, she saw that she had a blanket over her. 'I must've fallen asleep while doing my homework.'

12:45am she saw as she looked at the clock on the TV.

"Casey? What's wrong? Did you have a nightmare?" Derek heard Lizzy ask as he slipped in through the back. He was late for curfew and didn't want to get caught.

"Derek, you can relax, mom and George went to a party and decided to spend the night. I told them you were already home." Said Casey as she saw his shadow.

Derek whipped his head around. "How'd you know it was me?"

"Your not exactly suddle." Replied Lizzy.

"Why are you so late anyway?"

"You know how dates can go." He said winking.

"Ew Derek! That's my sister you're talking to!" yelled a disgusted Casey.

"Casey, I'm twelve. I know what you do on a date."

"Excuse me?! And who has been taking you on these dates?!" Yelled Derek.

She breathed a sigh of relief as she quietly slipped out the room and into the kitchen.

At least lizzy wasn't asking her about the dream anymore. Casey's breath caught in her throat as she thought about the dream. She felt tears fill her eyes as slid her back down the wall and sat down.

'He can't get to you if you don't let him.' She remembered her therapist saying.

Exhale. I'm better then him. Inhale.. It was just a dream. Exhale. He cant get to me if I don't let him. Inhale. And I wont let him get to me. Exhale.

"What's his name? I swear to god I'll kill him!" Casey whipped her head around and sighed a breath of relief when she realized he was still talking to Lizzy about her 'dates'.

She smiled. Derek had his sweet moments.

"Ouch!" she yelped as she stood up and banged her head into the pots handing above the stove.

"Hey Klutzilla, try not to break anything on your way out will ya?" called Derek.

Casey rolled her eyes.

Apparently the moment was over.

"Yeah I'm fine! Thanks for asking!" She yelled back as she rubbed her head. That was going to leave a bump.

…………………………………………………………………………..

**And that's it as of now. I've written a couple of other stories, but have never finished passed the 2****nd**** chapter. (I think..) I always lose interest. But I'm determined to do a good job on this one, so let me know what you think! (If it's a good thought..)**

**To my reviewers, thanks a lot! I'm glad you find it interesting!**

**As always, if you don't like it, don't read it. No flames. Review please!**

**JJ**


	3. Truth

**Truth.**

"Casey! Are you alright?" asked a concerned Nora when she saw her daughter come into the kitchen. Her hair was disheveled and her eyes looked puffy.

She stifled a yawn "Yeah mom, I'm fine, didn't get much sleep last night." She was too scared to go to sleep last night after her nightmare.

"I thought you were sleeping when I came in last night?" said a confused Derek as he poured the last bit of milk onto his cereal.

"What do you mean came in last night? Casey said you were already in when I spoke to her." Said Nora as Lizzy came in.

"Oh yeah! Casey, I wanted to ask you. What was that dream you had that shook you up so bad?" said lizzy curiously.

Nora's head snapped up and looked at Casey. "Nightmare?"

Derek looked at Nora confused. Why was she so interested? Not that he was complaining. It took the heat off of him and hopefully she would be so concerned about Casey she'd forget.

When Casey didn't say anything Nora told her to go take a shower and meet her in Casey's room when she was done.

Derek quickly slipped upstairs to his room before Nora took notice of him.

…………………………………

When Casey was done, she told Derek he could have the shower and went to her room.

Once she had gotten dressed she heard a knock on the door.

"Casey?" called Nora.

Once Casey had opened the door, Nora sat on her bed and pulled Casey into her arms.

"Its happening again isn't it?" Derek heard her say to Casey, as he was about to walk to the bathroom. He paused at her door, which was slightly ajar, confused. What was happening again?

"Oh god mom. It was terrible. I don't understand why its happening again."

Derek raised his eyebrows.

"I thought they were gone Case? What could have happened to trigger it off?" Said Nora in a hoarse voice.

"I stopped taking the pills when we moved here. I didn't need them anymore." Said Casey avoiding the second question.

'Pills? What pills? Casey was on pills?' thought Derek. She sounded strange. Almost like she did in the car. But it was different this time. There was a hollow sound in her voice.

What the hell is going on with you Case?

So whatever it was that Casey was going through, Nora obviously knew about it.

He saw Casey look up at the door so he quickly made his way to the bathroom before she could come out.

"Its okay mom. Maybe I just need to go back on the pills." Said Casey. She could've sworn she saw something move at the door.

"Casey. I love you, more than anything in this world. You and Lizzy are the most important people in my life. You know that right?" said Nora as her eyes filled with tears.

"I know mom. I know. I think, that its time to go back to Dr. Ross."

Nora nodded. "Anything you want. If you think it will help you, then I'll set up an appointment."

"Thanks mom." Nora looked at her daughter sadly. She was so strong. How she was able to go through that and still put up a fight was a wonder. But then, how a man could do something so vile was a wonder in itself. A fucked up sick wonder.

"Mom, I love you too." Said Casey softly as she reached up and caressed her moms face.

"I know baby. I know." Said Nora gently.

………………………………………………………………

"I asked for an angel of mercy

To come down and save me

To take me away

From my personal hell- argh no! Why cant I get this right?" said a frustrated Casey. She looked at her guitar in contempt thinking of the many ways she could destroy it.

She had been trying to find the right chords that would match the song she wrote but it just didn't seem to be happening for her.

She looked up as she saw Edwin come tumbling down the stairs.

"Whoa Ed, relax. You're going to break your neck going so fast." She said, her motherly instinct coming into play.

Edwin rolled his eyes and started to walk away when he saw her guitar.

"You play guitar?" he looked shocked.

"A bit. I haven't taken it out in a while though."

"How come?" he asked as Derek came through the door.

"I never really had time. I was either fighting with Derek, out with Emily or at school."

"So what's different now?" he asked curiously. Maybe she would teach him. When he asked Derek to teach him, he always said that he was busy. Which was usually true. He either had a date, was with Sam or had band practice. When he wasn't busy, then he was making fun of Casey.

"I decided that I really didn't need to be on the dance committee. Kendra is way too happy all the time." Said a disgusted Casey.

"And here I thought you simply adored her." Mocked Derek, in a high-pitched voice.

" Sorry Dare-Bear, just because she's your girlfriend doesn't mean I need to see her 24/7." Replied Casey.

"Um hello? I don't do girlfriends?" he scoffed.

"Coulda fooled me." Said Casey before acting out Kendra. "Oh Derek! That's the spot. Oh right there" she moaned.

Edwin snickered and Derek looked shocked.

"I didn't mean it that way! I meant relationships!" Casey burst into laughter at his appalled face.

"ANYWAY! Casey, do you think you could teach me?" interrupted Edwin before a full-fledged fight broke out.

"Teach you what?" said Derek.

"Guitar. Sure ed, but you have to be willing to learn. And you have to practice it." Said Casey seriously.

Edwin nodded vigorously.

Derek snorted. " and you know how to play?"

"Obviously." She said pointing to the guitar beside her.

Ding-dong

Edwin opened the door to a man he had never seen before.

"Hey kid is Casey Macdonald here?" Edwin glared. He wasn't a kid!

"Yeah. She's in the living room." He said as he stepped aside to let the man come in.

why was he here to see Casey anyway? He looked to old to go to her school.

"Just because I show off about it, doesn't mean I don't know how!" yelled Casey. Derek rolled his eyes and was about to retort when he heard chuckling.

"Well well, looks like you're just as loud as ever."

Derek watched the Casey whip around.

"What the hell are you doing here?" yelled Casey. Derek winced. Damn she was loud.

"Is that anyway to greet your boyfriend?" said the man. Derek raised his eyebrow and felt his stomach tighten. Boyfriend?!

Edwin looked confused, the same thought running through his head. He's too old to be her boyfriend!

"Ex-boyfriend." Corrected Casey as Derek sighed in relief. Why he was relieved, he didn't know. But he would worry about it later.

"Aren't you going to introduce me?"

"Because you deserve to be introduced?" retorted Casey folding her arms across her chest.

"Can we help you….?" said Derek finally cutting in. he sent a confused glance at Casey.

"Chase. My names chase. And no not really. Just wanted to see Cassidy, its been a while."

Derek saw Casey stiffen at the name. The same way she did with that Merlin chick.

"Wait what? Casey's name is Cassandra, not Cassidy." Said a confused Edwin.

"Exactly, so please refrain from calling me that." Said Casey stiffly.

Derek looked between Chase and Casey. They seemed to be having a silent war between them. Derek took this time to look chase up and down. He was tall, with broad shoulders. He had spiky black hair with deep blue eyes.

"You got it Cassandra." Said Chase emphasizing on Cassandra.

"So babe, how you been?" he asked as he lazily sat down on the couch.

"Why are you here?" said Casey ignoring his question.

"As I told Derek here, I hadn't seen you in a while. Thought I'd say hi."

"And you said it, now leave." Said Casey coldly. Derek looked at Edwin. Edwin looked as confused as he was.

"Look Cas, I know I did some pretty shitty things, but cant we get past it? For gods sakes, you were my best friend before we were involved. If you wont let me love you again, then why cant you just let me be your friend?" He sounded so pleading that even Derek started to feel sorry for him.

"If you don't get out of my house, so help me god, I'll make sure your in pain in every time you go to the bathroom" Casey threatened.

"Casey! Relax! Cut the guy some slack." Said Edwin. Casey was being way to hard on him. Whatever he did, it couldn't be that bad could it?

"Cut him some slack? CUT HIM SOME SLACK?!" Derek took Casey by the shoulders and turned her so she was standing in front of him. "Breathe Case just breathe."

She jerked away from Derek so quickly that even Edwin was stunned.

Riiiiing. Edwin left the room to go answer the phone.

She turned towards Chase. "Do you know how much I needed you?" She screamed, her voice breaking.

"While I was being beaten, you were out fucking the bastards girlfriend! And you want me to cut you some fucking slack?"

Derek felt a pain go through him. Beaten?

Chase looked shocked. "What do you mean Beaten? What the fuck did Ace do?"

'Isn't that, that Merlin chicks boyfriend? Ace?' Derek's head was reeling. He couldn't imagine Casey being hurt. He didn't want to imagine Casey being hurt.

Casey slid onto the floors, holding her knees to her chest.

"I hate you. I hate you for making me relive this." She rocked back and forth.

Chase started to go to Casey but Derek beat him to it. He sat behind her and pulled her into his arms so that he rocked back and forth with her.

"Casey? What did Ace do?" Chase demanded again but more gently this time.

"Not now Chase. Please. Just not now." Whispered Casey.

The same words she said to me in the car. After we saw Ace.

Chase was quiet.

"I'm sorry for what I did with Merlin. I had too much to drink after we had that fight. And when you didn't show up that night I figured it was over. I was hurt and she was right there. I'm so sorry." Said Chase as he held his head in his hands.

"I don't need your excuses. I don't need you." Casey said, getting louder with each word she said.

Chase winced. "I know you don't. But I need you. Let me help you." He begged.

"I came to you. I wanted you to help me. Make me forget. But you didn't care. You had Merlin so why would you care right?" Derek tightened his grip on Casey.

"I cared. But I thought you didn't want me. My ego couldn't take it." Said chase.

"Screw your ego. I was raped you asshole, and all you could see was yourself."

Derek's face turned white. Oh god. He shut his eyes tightly and started to rock back and forth with Casey harder. He never thought anything could cause him the pain he was going through now. Sure he and Casey fought a lot, but he needed her. She could make him smile when no one else could.

Chase bent down in front of Casey and took her face in his hands.

"I was a bastard. Nothing I say can change that. I loved you then and I love you now. And I promise you, Ace will regret the day he saw your face."

With that said, he turned around, quickly left his number on top of the coffee stand and walked out the door.

Casey let out a sob and leaned back into Derek.

Derek moved her around so that her head was on his chest.

Casey moved to rush off but Derek tightened his arms around her.

"Its okey Case. I'm here now. I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry."

She had tears streaming down her face, and Derek didn't think that she could look anymore broken. She was sobbing full out by the time Derek picked her up and started to take her up the stairs to her room. She started to struggle and hit his chest but Derek just held on tighter. "Let me go! Let me go!" She screamed.

Derek stopped. She thought he was going to do the same thing Ace had.

"Its okay Case. It's just me. I'm just going to take you upstairs." He said soothingly.

She seemed to calm down as he walked slowly up the stairs. Once he got to her room, he laid her down on the bed. He sat on the bed beside her and told himself he was only going to stay until she calmed down. He moved a piece of hair that was sticking to her face because of the tears and moved it behind her ear,

"Derek? Will you lie with me?" whispered Casey so softly that Derek wasn't sure if he heard her correctly. When he saw her looking at him expectantly so he laid beside her and put an arm over her. 'I'm only going to lie here until she falls asleep.' He thought as he yawned.


End file.
